If they can find happiness together and they both also know that their departed spouses would both "approve," why wait when you never know how long you will have with someone?Just so it looks good to other people while you are miserable as a result?My late husband has been gone almost three years.......were together over twenty years...was an awesome marriage. I have let my children know that no matter what they " think", my life is indeed my own.........I will make my own choices.I dated several times..had a half - hearted relationship which was a disaster ........ ( LOL.......son is in Army 12 years....wanted name , SS, everything), my daughter's wanted to go with me!! They are respectful of that and only want me to be happy. I have not faced the normal problems of him thinking he is competing with a " ghost" because his mother was also widowed. Well, she's back and she ain't single--but happily-ever-after?
My thoughts when I heard about it was, okay, it is a little unusual for someone who truly adored his wife but these folks aren't getting any younger.because she appreciated having a second chance at real love.The other day I was talking to a group of widows and all of them without fail expressed the problems with bringing a new love into their life and their problems with their own children...... The only real problem I have faced is my step-children....they think I have lost my love for their daddy, and or forgot...going on with my life.One of the things they discussed was him staying alone out of grief.She firmly believed that he would probably be dead not long after her and she encouraged him to go on living and pretty much told him marry "Jane." These wishes were made known to the children by her before she died.