‘But one has to understand that it would be very difficult if she did not have her own children.’ And perhaps this is the issue: maybe incoming partners — particularly if they have not started a family — just do not know where the boundaries lie with their partner’s kids, or the hurt they might be unwittingly causing. ‘The washing of hair, choosing and buying a child’s clothes, the snuggling up to read a story.
The things that to a dad might not mean that much, but to a mum are really important.‘For men, the biggest fear is often of being completely replaced in their child’s life, but for women, fears are mostly centred around new partners doing the intimate little things — such as holding your youngster’s hand.
"This sometimes happens with the lungs, which are very fragile. Sometimes, at the last minute, things don't work out." I looked up at him and said: "That's OK. It's in God's hands now." After that, I don't remember anything until slowly becoming aware of a buzz of voices calling my name: "Claire, wake up.
It's over." I awakened gently, feeling no bodily or physical sensation - nothing but pure consciousness and a cacophony of voices.
I can still picture the look on his face when, during one particularly heated discussion over access and childcare arrangements, I told him that if he continued to be difficult I would simply move away, get married, have more children and he would have to deal with another man being ‘Daddy’.
Friends have warned me that when my son is older, he might want to spend more time with his father and ask to meet whoever it is my ex is then seeing.
Someone brought me a pen and paper, and I scribbled my question: Did I get them? "Everything's fine." Then I lapsed back into unconsciousness. I wondered whether Mr Baldwin had sewn it in right.As the mother of an eight-year-old boy, I know only too well how the thought of another woman ever being a ‘parent’ to your child leaves a very bitter taste in the mouth.And it is something I for one will never allow to happen.Later, after my initial recovery from the operation, I began to think of more questions. I felt it was beating deeper in my chest than my old heart had. When I asked the surgeon, he explained that he'd had to position my new heart farther back than the old one, to fit it in.It was nice to know that I still had some connection to reality.